I hadn’t watched a single episode of Oprah for its entire 25 year run. But my wife recorded the finale and I tuned in. I’ve been a bit snooty when it came to all things Oprah (although I was praying that one of my books would make it on her recommended list.)
As it turns out Oprah is one hell of a preacher. The episode was essentially an extended sermon, with commercial breaks. (There’s a whole new revenue stream the church might consider.) Watching her in action helped me to understand why Oprah made such a difference in the lives of so many people.
The truth is that she’s made more of a difference in people’s lives than I ever will. (This probably explains my arrogance). Despite being a billionaire, she came across as though status, fame, and wealth were the least of her concerns. She was genuinely humble and loving.
I’ll summarize her sermon, point by point, and then weigh in on what the church has to learn for Oprah’s wisdom.
- We all have the power to change our own lives. Over the past 25 years, Oprah interviewed countless examples of people who were a lot worse off than most of us, who faced reality, and then displayed miraculous resilience. We really should return to the practice of testimonials. But then again, are lives being changed in our congregations?
- We are responsible for our own lives. Feel your pain. Do your work. Then get on with it. I want to put the quote that adorns Harpo Studios, above the entrance to our sanctuary: “Please take responsibility for the energy you bring to this place.” By teaching this one simple, (yet incredibly difficult), practice, the church would be transformed. I’m serious. Most of the clergy I come across when I do workshops across the country spend most of their time cleaning up either their own emotional messes or the messes of members who refuse to take responsibility for the energy they bring. When we exist in and create cultures of victimhood, shame, and blame, not much else is going to be happening besides dealing with the dramas of the small self.
- The one common characteristic we all share, from Presidents to paupers, is that we’re not sure we’re good enough and we just want to be validated. No exceptions. We all have different ways of getting that validation, but the important thing is to remember that nine times out of ten when somebody is being an idiot, what they are really wanting is to know that somebody loves them. We talk about God being love, but are we intentionally developing cultures of love?
- Each of us has a unique stage and a unique vocation, which may or may not be the work we do. And don’t confuse vocation with status. We are the ones we have been waiting for. At Canadian Memorial our practice of helping people know, claim, and deploy their unique gifts for ministry has been transformative.
- Learn to listen to God. God still “speaks” to us. Be still, and tune into a Mind that is much more intelligent, intuitive, and holistic that our rational mind. As I say in my book, The Emerging Church, practices of contemplation and stillness are one of the best tools we have to create some space between ourselves and the cultural narratives that keep us spinning in ego’s orbit.
- Never doubt that God is real as the loving presence who is always bringing order and pattern out of apparent chaos.
- We’re here to serve and to make the world a better place than how we found it. Her entire Harpo team was in service, and that, she said made the difference.
Oprah focuses primarily on the line of emotional intelligence. God is invoked as comforter, healer, the One who empowers. I’ve felt for some time now that the church has skipped over the emotional life of the congregation, the skills of loving connection, and working with the shadow. In my denomination we’ve focused for the past 25 years on social transformation, and to a small extent on spiritual practice. But we’re discovering that when these are built on top of a shaky psychological, emotional, and relational foundation, the agenda gets sabotaged. It’s time to take a step back, and do our interior work and our relational work. Let’s stop hurting each other. If we can’t make our own communities a better place and more loving place, chances are we don’t have much to offer the world.
By the way, I don’t really believe we’ve heard the last of Oprah. Apparently she bought her own television network. I just might pay more attention next time around.
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Yeah, I tuned in to the last show too. I was stunned with the sermon I heard and the integrity that came across so simply. Unlike you I have watched a few of her shows with my daughter, and have actually participated in an online book study when she was working with Eckhart Toller and A New Earth. I think she is utterly amazing and the church could do a lot worse than study the phenomenon of Oprah to learn about connecting with people in their soul space. Good for you to overcome your snobbery to take a closer look at a true “wise woman” of our times.
Thanks Meg
And wouldn’t it be great if we could also figure out her organizational and funding skills to boot! As a church, we need both her “sermon” and her organizational smarts.
Amen, brother David!
Bruce,
“We are responsible for our own lives. Feel your pain. Do your work. Then get on with it.” This is definitely true and definitely a requirement, but is it just me or doesn’t it also sound incredibly lonely?
Well, we don’t need to do it alone, of course. In fact, we can’t. “Doing one’s work” actually reconnects one to all of reality. So, actually, it’s more like coming home, than being lonely. It does take resolve however. If we can find a way not to do it, we’ll probably choose that path. But not to do the work is the very definition of loneliness – me thinks.
Yes, for sure. I guess it is Oprah’s promotion of the successful ‘individual’ that can bother me. No one writes history about the patient advisors to the King, kind of thing. I wonder if she interviewed the people who influenced the individual’s success, how extraordinary some of them must be to have moved someone to want to take on the responsibility of the work, despite it often being work they’d prefer to avoid. Although, I guess some times it is the people we don’t admire that also influence us to take on personal responsibility. Maybe it is a good balance between the two that creates healthy individual resolve, I’m not sure, maybe?
Anyway, your point about ‘not doing the work equalling loneliness’ – good one. I will spend some time with that – thanks
Great idea for a book/series of some sort, Jill. Talk to the people in the background who grease the wheels, make the calls, brief the “stars”, groom the Queen/King.
Andrew Cohen recently did a series where he interviewed 25 “stars”, but had them talk about and give thanks to their own mentors. Quite powerful.
I followed her shows pretty faithfully in these last few months, and she did several with her producers and people who work behind the scenes. The basically shared their insights into what it takes to make the shows, etc. Anyway, I think she did a fair job of presenting how much of a team effort it has been for the last 25 years.
Thanks Paige,
Good to know that the impression that Oprah conveyed on her last show was confirmed by her team.
Thanks for your good words about Oprah. I only occasionally saw her show but wish I’d seen this finale, always thought she had a rare gift for relating to people heart to heart and bringing out the best.
Big heart, for sure. Thanks Karen
Great Piece Bruce! Must have been the energy of your place of writing!
Seriously, Oprah is one of many examples where “the Spirit”, known by many names in many traditions, simply insists on getting our attention. I am certain that she has a lot of her own very difficult work. For me this also relates to your earlier piece on “hope”. We don’t have to go very far to see hundreds of hopeful signs that Spirit simply is alive and well in and among us! Fortunately for all of us that energy is not confined by geographical or institutional barriers.
Thank you, gracious host! It did help that I was eating raw granola soaked overnight in Kefir, fresh baked muffins, and drinking espresso from freshly roasted beans.
And thanks for inspiring my blog yesterday – spiritual synergy!
I Invite anyone interested to check it out at: http://annesimmonds.wordpress.com/
Thanks for writing this. I will be passing it along. God Bless.
So very well said, brother!
You are the second blogger to whom I have linked … as I have been processing the profound experience of watching that last show. I had to grab my journal and take notes! I’m not quite ready to go through my notes like you have here, but I’ll get there eventually … maybe ;^)
I have watched Oprah on and off (as life circumstances allowed) for the entire 25 years … and have seen the good and the not-so-good … but consistently believed that she was doing what she felt was being asked of her — for the sake of others.
http://abisomeone.blogspot.com/2011/06/abi-and-oprah-part-2.html
Be blessed….
Thanks Peggy,
For your blessing and for sharing your thoughts.